7 months and now this…

So I made a huge mistake of telling  my madre something I probably shouldn’t have…I thought she could help me and be a mother/friend in this case..but i guess she couldn’t. At first she was helpful and loving and then a couple days later took me away from something she knows I really care about which doesn’t make sense. So the thing I told her was that me and my bf are having sex..and I asked her for birth control which I thought was the responsible thing to do because I obviously didn’t want to get pregnant..and she was all cool with it and she made sure it was my descion and everything and she made sure i was ok. which I was. Then a couple days later I went up to santa cruz with my brother for a day or two and my bf went to this camp for 5 days and i was really missing him then I came back and he came back a day after I did and me and him snuck into my housde when no one was home so we could just hang out alone and NOT DO ANYTHING just hang out but then  my stupid neighbor called my mom and told her that he was there at m house…which was soo dumb and so then my mom grounds me for a very long time from my bf which is dumb because the night i told her i want birth control she went off about how heartbreaking it would be if we broke up and now she was basically breaking us up..i mean we weren’t offically breaking up but she blocked my texting from him and  not aloud to see him and its summer so it sooo dumb…..i just dont understand parents especially in this situation because she was telling me how I will be soooo upset if we break up..so why would she do that?? It just doesn’t make sense…I cried myself to sleep last night not knowing what to do…this is the stupidest thing i think she could have done..its not like we were even doing anything and I do have the capableness of saying NO mother…god you dumbass. How would you feel if I took away the one thing in life that made you severly happy…because im normally a depressed person and he was the one to make me less depressed. Because of him I accutally looked forward to things in life now all i get to do is sit at home and count the days i get him back while i think about mutilation…I would never do it but i soo wish I had the balls to. I would never kill myself over a boy but it does sure make life sound good to not have a stressfull life and to just be some dead lifeless body in the ground..see this is what that whore makes me think about…death…who wants that from their fucking teenage daughterr..she probABLY WOULDN’T even feel bad if I died…and neither would my father at that. They would probably like oh once less person to take care of….

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This entry was published on July 3, 2012 at 10:18 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

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